Hello and welcome to my world. This is going to be a journey of finding something positive in everything. I truly believe that everything in my life that has ever happened can have something positive in and around it. It doesn’t matter how bad, painful, or good it was; once I deal with it; it becomes a memory. Where that memory gets placed is a whole other story. If the memory rests in a positive place as opposed to a painful or hurtful place; I believe it will serve me better. So far I have found this to leave me feeling better about my past and therefore a little bit better about my future.
On this journey I will find the positive in each and every event in my life that I can remember. It is a fact that a lot of my life is a blank space in the here and now. I do have faith that when I am ready these memories will be revealed.
The truth starting out on this journey is that I am a recovering addict. I spent most of my life in active addiction. I recently celebrated six years clean and live my life today believing that God has a better plan for me. I do not know what that is; although some days I think it is for his personal amusement. I know he constantly shakes his head and chuckles at some of my thought processes and behaviors.
So much of my life was in tremendous pain, both physically and emotionally. Even facing it, walking through it, feeling it and letting it go did not leave me with a certain freedom I was looking for. When I chose at the end of the process to find a positive, any sort of positive, it became a good memory and I found the freedom I was looking for.
I will talk about the old memories I have already did this with and new ones as it happens. I will take you on my journey of me finding positive in my whole life.